Anger!

Where does 'anger' fit in our survival scheme of things? Its genesis can be fairly judged; after all there was a need for emotional response to provocation and 'anger' is manifestation of that response. Anger, apparently is primal, preceding arrival of modern man. Anger is also universal; all creatures who can display emotions also express anger. One can understand the need of analytical resources required to understand dynamics of ‘anger’ therefore its prevalence in animals is understandable but Man?
Man has have evolved with time adapting and assimilating with experience best ways that help in his survival therefore our surrender to ‘anger’ is incomprehensible. Surely our complex mind must have realized the destructive nature of ‘anger’. Anger inhibits rational thinking therefore restricts best retaliation to provocation. This is very elementary conclusion therefore our mind should have figured this out and gradually blunted its persistence. Indeed ‘anger’ cannot be eliminated but our evolution with time must have allowed its quick dissipation rather than its snowballing feature!

The Stranger

‘Stranger’ does not have the aura, mystery or expectation of encounter associated with ‘Ajnabi’. It is a fascinating word, full of contradiction because you only use it in anticipation of unraveling the mystery of ‘ajnabi’ or in expectation of an encounter with the stranger. But more than external significance ‘ajnabi’ has deep spiritual meaning in literature; of exposing or understanding our own other persona. Do we know us? Hardly, we surprise ourselves revealing layers over layer during our lifetime meanwhile external persona itself undergoing metamorphosis repeatedly.

What derails serenity of life are unexpected occurrences forcing reassessment of our own identity. We pride on some of our power attributes only to learn how in astonishingly bizarre manner in they affect us.

Am I a stone hearted, feelingless monster? Why then I don’t cry like others, why doesn’t sorrow overwhelm me? Why I am left lacking, dissatisfied and incomplete in life?

The only time I cried uncontrollably was when I saw inert body of my daughter in the hearse. The cries on other occasions were not the same perhaps it was socially appropriate therefore!

I am in state of denial, I can’t imagine Kriti in any other form but alive.

The more I know about myself the more ‘ajnabi’ I become.

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